Day 68: Limitation

Hello!

Happy Memorial Day!

...I have a lot of venting to do, but I promise it's leading to a point...

This week has been crazy trying to secure a location for our church services. Thankfully, the National Park Service expedited our campground amphitheater permit request and helped us secure a place for our summer services. This was an enormous blessing to us, but it required a lot of time preparing for our first service, particularly spreading advertising for the services both Friday and Saturday evening.

In the midst of this, we've encountered a couple limitations in the forms of advertising we're allowed to do. In this location, we are not allowed to go "campground calling", where our team walks the campground informing park visitors of the weekend activities of the resort (it is how we are allowed to inform people of our Sunday worship service). In addition to this, we are not able to advertise our services through posters or notices in public spaces either. I have worked in two other national parks where we had similar situations. In such a situation, we're allowed to put signs up in designated employee areas--in informing the staff about our services, inquiring guests can hear about these services, along with offering these services to the employees as well.

In the midst of this, my weekend was complicated with a lack of Internet. As more employees are arriving, access to Internet is also diminishing. I haven't had an Internet signal since Thursday night in the park...I'm making this post at the Safeway Starbucks in town.

After a long day of work on Friday and running around the resort putting up advertising for the services, I was spent; yet I could not readily fall asleep because my mind was racing and the full moon shone beckoned me to spend time outdoors walking. As I walked in the lunar illumination, all my frustrations, fears, doubts, and struggles started pouring out in prayer. Though everything turned out well for the ministry team and for the week in general, I was overwhelmed by voices of failure and discouragement--everything this week seemed to come only through struggle and forcing ends to meet. I prayed that God would show me a way in the midst of my struggling week.

When I awoke the next morning, my discouragement was turning into despair; my daily devotions was met with voices criticizing the verses I read, stripping them of the promises they held for me. It was here that I recognized that this despair was not my own; I wanted to trust God and believe His promise, but was lacking in strength. As I prayed for hope, I began to flip the pages of my Bible to my daily reading, and immediately the pages opened to Jeremiah 29:11: "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord; 'plans to prosper you and give you a hope and a future. Then you will search for Me and find Me.'"This was a moment that filled me with affirmation of God's plan in all of this struggle--that I can trust that in the mist of my frustration He is doing a work here at the resort that I don't yet see.

Sunday turned out well spent. KelLee and I held our first service at the campground amphitheater with three others joining--two other employees and one local. I was thrilled that even with such little advertising and short notice, we were still able to launch the summer's services with a good start.

This morning, I again opened up my Bible and continued my regular Bible reading; I'm currently reading through the Gospel of Mark. Here, Jesus returned to His hometown of Nazareth where the locals rejected Jesus' ministering--they were too familiar with Jesus as a local boy and the "illegitimate child" of Mary. They couldn't really see him as anything else, and therefore Jesus wasn't able to minister much to them. The passage finishes by saying that Jesus couldn't do much because of their unbelief. Here's a great example of the phrase, "Familiarity breeds contempt". In pondering the passage, wondering if I would be one of the ones who would limit Jesus because I was too familiar with who I expected Jesus to be that I wasn't able to see Him as anything more.

While pondering this, the question was reversed: am I too familiar with my own self--my own struggles, doubts, fears, past, and limitations--that I don't believe God can do anything more in my life than what I deem myself capable of doing? Do I limit God ministering through me because I don't believe He can do more than I can physically and willfully muster? If I release my expectations of my own self and what I think I am personally capable of accomplishing...maybe I can release God to do so much more through me.

This has been a shot of hope to me today. I wanted to pass this along with a prayer that each of us can take God's promise, "Call upon Me and I will show you great and mighty things you do not know" (Jeremiah 33:3).

A recording of this Sunday's sermon at the campground is available on my Summer Sermons page.
Due to the amount of preparation this week required for Sunday's service, I wasn't able to get any new photos for the week. Sorry.

Enjoy your week!

Day 63: Crosses: Some Assembly Required

Hello!

This week has been filled with an accumulation of busyness and frustrations: trying to help dissatisfied customers, keeping pace with the increasing number of guests checking in each night, keeping up with school, trying to complete arrangements for the ministry team's Sunday services, and trying to make time for resting.

In the midst of this, some great progress was made. My entire week was worthwhile when ACMNP received its final approval for our service location. We got the location we hoped for, at the time we hoped for. Furthermore, the first of my two ACMNP teammates arrived on Sunday. Her name is KelLee, and she is from Pennsylvania. This is her first year with ACMNP. She has jumped in to the ministry with both feet as we've been preparing for our first service this upcoming Sunday.

With our location secure, I spent the past two days preparing advertising to spread around the resort for both employees and guests. As this is a new location for the ministry, there are several additional details that we're having to do to prepare. One of them, as it turned out, was that we needed a cross for the services. In all the years that I've in ministry, I don't think I've ever needed to produce a cross for a ministry. They all came with the ministry, and I didn't have find a way to get one. This recognition made the task seem so much more special. I gathered the supplies needed to assemble, glue, paint, seal, and nail...yes, nail...my cross together.

Nailing my cross together was a bit surreal. I have experienced "surrender services", where I am suppose to write down a sin, burden, or idol in my life onto a piece of paper and nail that paper onto a wooden cross to symbolize Jesus taking it all upon Himself when He died upon the cross. I have also experienced role playing with drama teams in plazas, churches, or parks in which I have played the Christ figure and have had the other dramatists "crucify" me on a cross in these plays. Having lived so closely to crosses all of my life, the act of building a cross shouldn't seem all that much different, but it did.

When I think of nailing a cross, I instantly picture Jesus' crucifixion and the nails used upon His hands and feet, not the image of a carpenter assembling two beams of wood in full recognition of the product's intended purpose. But that is what struck me in doing this--Jesus once told his disciples that following Him meant taking up a cross. Often this scripture is read figuratively, indicating something we must surrender or die to in order to follow Christ, but for the disciples...as well as millions of Christians throughout the centuries, this figurative word becomes literal in martyrdom.  Within this, were the disciples aware that in following Jesus, their cross needed assembly? Their crosses weren't pre-fabricated; instead, their acts of ministry and words of good news were eventually pieced together to form the fibers, grain, knots, and beams that would eventually result in their own martyrdom. In building a cross this week, I was struck with the question of whether I would be willing to surrender myself on the very cross I was constructing to serve within ministry here (my cross is very small in size, but the thought remains true). The thought makes the realization of Jesus' sacrifice all the more weighty. Jesus assembled His own figurative cross through three years of ministry and took it to Jerusalem knowing He would be crucified upon an actual one caused by his ministry. There were easier ways to choose, or abandon the idea entirely; yet Jesus chose to His cross.

Thoughts about what it means to bear one's cross quickly became very poignant. After spending my morning designing and distributing advertising for Sunday's services, I was informed that we would not be allowed to hold these services in this location. After spending weeks trying to get this location approved, the plug was pulled, and we went back to starting our search again. I then had to walk through the resort pulling my signs, contact ACMNP about the situation, and try to figure out an alternative solution. To top this off, after weeks of preparation to launch a Tuesday night Bible study, no one arrived for the starting night. It wasn't a good complement to the day I was having.

In the midst of disappointment and frustration, I considered cross-bearing. There are so many easier ways to spend my summer; there are so many other things I could be doing. Even complaining seems like an easier alternative to remaining steadfast to submitting to God, trusting that He has a plan in the midst of this. I didn't realize that cross-bearing in this situation was found with assembling the details, logistics, and preparations of getting this ministry launched at this location.

In the midst of my frustration though, God provided grace. As I was completing the paperwork to hold Sunday services at another location, our application was expedited even though, as the front desk worker informed me, the manager was currently swamped with work. That this manager would take time out to review our application so quickly meant a lot to me. We should hear the results of our application within the next few days, and if all goes well, KelLee and I will be on track for launching Sunday services this weekend.

Please pray for us as we try to complete the logistics for this location, and that I will be given grace to endure while learning to bear my cross.

Very few photos of the week due to my busyness, but are available.

Blessings!In the midst of disappointment and frustration, I considered cross-bearing. The

Day 55: Remember To Buy Postcards

Hello!

The season is picking up. I am grateful that the season has been slow enough to this point that I have been able to build a rhythm before the full season ensues. Now that I have most of the basics of the front desk covered and familiar, I've been challenging myself to start remembering guests' names. It's amazing how people respond when they hear their name spoken to them the next day--it's the feeling that someone went out of their way to make sure they remembered you. Guests are now coming to the front desk, and in several occasions, they've waited specifically for me to help them. This in turn is a big boost for me.

Even though this sounds idyllic, remembering everyone's name is difficult. Most of the time, I'll remember one's face, but not their name. Several times I've made the mistake of crossing people's names as well, so I'm aiming for accuracy in the midst of this. While I'm struggling to remember a name, the guests are usually gracious, but sometimes I'll get an annoyed look instead that seems to say, "The name is Smith. It's always been Smith." This is when saying "Hey you!" seems to be a very attractive alternative.

This week I celebrated a milestone: I sent out my 200th postcard of the year! I really should setup a PayPal account with a note saying, "Want a postcard? Chip in a buck." On an average week I send 10-15 postcards, and sometimes I'll do 25-30. Normally, I pass the 200 postcard mark in mid-August when I am preparing to return home; so I'm curious to see how many will be sent total. I started doing postcards my first year at Zion National Park. Having so many friends and family back in the Pacific Northwest, buying souvenirs for everyone is impractical for a college student, so instead I send postcards. It helps people participate vicariously in my summer experience, doesn't take too much time, and is far less expensive than getting a small trinket no one would use upon my return. Within my list of people I regularly send postcards to, this week I discovered that I kept making an address error to one particular person (Sorry, Mom). After five years of postcards, how in the world could I forget her address? How many times do I flip through my address book trying to remember my sister's new address when I've written it on these postcards for the past three weeks?

As the rainstorms have passed further east, I was able to grab my guitar last week and watch the sunset. I am loving Lake Powell because of the incredible sunsets we're getting here! The red rocks glow in the lingering light, followed by intensely fuchsia clouds. I was fiddling through songs, trying to remember the chords to play for each of them; often I would stop mid-song because I couldn't remember any more. In the midst of my plucking and trying to complete a song, I started plucking my guitar strings..."I have a Maker, He formed my heart. Before even time began my life was in His hands." As the song progressed, I no longer struggled to remember the chords; each new chord came naturally as I continued singing, "He knows my name. He knows my every thought. He sees each tear that falls and He hears me when I call".

What a contrast--I am always struggling with connecting names with faces, trying to remember people's new addresses, or even trying to pluck the right chords to songs that I have sung repeatedly hundreds of times, but before the world was even formed, God knows my name. I don't have to be afraid that He might've forgotten me or that He has more important things to keep in the forefront of His mind. He knows me, my doubts, my worries, my struggles, and my fears. Unlike the hotel guests who have to bring me up to date on their situation before I can engage and respond to these people, I can trust that He knows and that He cares.

This was a incredible word of encouragement to me this week. I hope it blesses your week too.

Photos of the week are now available on the Photos of the Week page. These pictures are from a nearby slot canyon on the Navajo Nation. It is so incredibly beautiful!

Blessings!

Day 50: The Source of Power

“Where does power come from?”, Eisenheim asked. New Line Cinemas released a film in 2006 called “The Illusionist”, in which an acclaimed traveling magician prepared for his next illusion before royalty with this question. Are some born to power? Is it an inherent right? Is it a mantle of responsibility? Eisenheim drew the crowned prince’s sword and began to share about Excalibur, a sword set in stone that only Camelot’s true, rightful king could remove.

Here at Lake Powell, three towering smoke stacks from the Navajo Generating Station mark the town of Page. This coal power plant provides electricity to one million homes across Arizona, Nevada, and California. Along with the white smoke drifting from these smokestacks is a rising steam from the plant's cooling stations--water provided by Lake Powell--another power generator, Glen Canyon Dam—one the largest dams in the United States. Despite the majestic simplicity of this 710’ concrete wall, the canyon rim is tangled with miles of power lines from Glen Canyon Dam’s hydroelectric plant. Electricity is the booming industry of Page. People as far away as Los Angeles turn on their living room lights routinely, but how many question the location or reliability of their power source?

Living four miles north of the Glen Canyon Dam as the smokestacks of the Navajo Generating Station can be seen from my dorm room, I am surrounded by images of power. This week has been spent making progress in completing arrangements for our ACMNP Sunday services my summer work with ACMNP begins. This is a new location for this ministry, so I feel very privileged to be stationed here for the summer. There are connections and relationships to make, church service times to finalize, scheduling Bible studies , along with summer studies for my seminary and work. In the midst of getting settled down, it seems there’s no stopping as I transition from moving to Lake Powell to starting my summer activities. The pace is decent, so I am avoiding early burnout, but the question of how I am going to accomplish all my goals this summer looms over me. As I pause to consider this, I look out my dorm room window where three towering smoke stacks loom in the distance, and the water of the lake is a constant reminder of the dam four miles away that makes work at this resort possible.

Even as I am starting at a new location, I am addressing my source of power. Jesus promises abundant life through Him, but do I ever depend more upon my own talents and skills instead of relying upon the gift of the Holy Spirit, God’s Word, and God’s promise to give wisdom to anyone who asks? Do I think power comes from my own ability to make ends meet or trust that God makes all things comes together for good to those who love Him? Or, perhaps more dangerously, am I like someone who uses power correctly but fail to acknowledge where it comes from? Do I remember to thank God for a day in which He gave me strength and guidance for the day?

As I am completing my first month here at Lake Powell, I have to pause and reconnect. God’s Word and the Holy Spirit are my source. Prayer is my powerline. By keeping my relationship with God strong, I can see His power infilling my every move as I prepare to launch this summer's ministry.

This week's photos are available on my Photos of the Week page.

Blessings to you!